New Place, New Friends, New Games

 New Place, New Friends, New Games

By James Lisk, June 16, 2025

In the introduction to James F. Cooper’s The Pioneers, the publisher writes “...the author had more pleasure in writing The Pioneers than the book will probably give to any of its readers.” I expect the this statement is also applies to this shorter recollection.

I felt odd when school started in August 1980. In my home town of Randleman, my brothers and  buddies were back in school while I was at home reading The Pioneers and helping mom. Older friends starting college were also gone. Adding to the oddness, my younger but taller brother was starting high school, moved up to the varsity football team, and connecting with my buddies, leaving me largely out of the loop. Picking-up my brother from football practice, I could see my marching band friends practicing in the distance and felt left-out.

Dorms opened for us students at NCSSM on Sunday, September 7, 1980 and I was excited to start. Mom, dad and all three of my younger brothers came along to help me move in.

Getting one of the rare single rooms in the “Main Building” was a pleasant surprise. After years of sharing a bedroom with my little brother, I had a room to myself! The dorm room was clean, though my mom insisted on giving it another cleaning.  I noticed that there was no lock on the door nor mirror in the bathroom. Fortunately, I brought a small mirror from home. The lock seemed un-needed.

After moving in and saying good-bye to my brothers and parents, I started to meet the other guys on the hall. In rooms close-by were Michael Riddle and Brian (Paul) Habit who became life-long friends. I soon met Lee Bulwinkle, Alex Rimberg, Tony Hefner, Dwayne Raiford, Walter Gordon, Chuck Long, Marshal Mauney and many other, all with diverse personalities, and eager to make friends. At dinner, I tried to get to know folks a bit better and was surprised by the number of students who were more interested in subjects other than science or math. The “Student Handbook 1980-1981” lists a dance that first evening, but I don’t think I stayed long.

Monday was exploring around the campus, learning about the dorm sign-out cards and similar administrative items. Our first work-study assignments may have been given then. At least one student wanted to discuss The Pioneers. Back in the dorm, I had a long philosophical conversation with several of the guys, which included Marshall describing reaching a trance-like state when he played his violin.

The first all-student meeting, held in what would soon be the library, may have been on that Monday, or later that week. Dr. Eilber assured us that the E.K. Powe dining was temporary, and asked us to speak up about our needs. One guy from my hall (not me!) suggested that we needed “a passion pit” for co-education romantic interaction, though his word choice was a bit more succinct. All of us students became silent, certain that this was not what Dr. Eilber was wanting to hear. The teachers’ and administrators’ faces responded with emotions ranging from amused to horrified. Dr. Eilber’s reply was essentially “no”: student lounges would be well-lit, open-doored, with limited hours for studying and socializing, and effectively chaperoned by residential advisors.

The New Games on Tuesday were designed to build a sense of community; and since then, I’ve since seen similar games in professional team-building events. These were cooperative activities, without winners or losers. 

In one game, each person took a turn standing in the middle of a circle, with everyone else lying on the ground, feet towards that person, forming a circle with arms up. The standing person would then fall backwards and be caught by the people on the ground and passed around the circle, then propped up again. I declined to be the standing-falling person, recalling a similar “trust-fall” in Boy Scouts being interrupted by a prankster. But I clearly remember one girl, with shoulder-length dark hair and the pettiest face, closing her eyes and falling back. For some reason, I really wanted to reach up and touch her as she went around, but alas, the fellows on either side of me had longer arms than me. Seven years later, I married that girl, Beth Kennedy, but that is getting ahead of the story.

Another game had two teams running across the field, one trying to tag and “catch” the members of the other team. Anyone who got through to the other side became the taggers on the next round. Near the end, Beth and I were left with only a few folks on one side and just a few moments to introduce ourselves before we were “captured” by the other side and ushered to the next event.

The New Games clearly worked. By the time classes started, I was comfortable in my new home and confident that a good year lay ahead of us.