Writing Prompt #12 - Phasing

Writing Prompt #12:  Write a story about the Student Judicial System, which included "three phases" of disciplinary action.

Due Date:  March 2, 2026

Details:  Write a story about how you, or someone else, received a Phase 1, 2, or 3 disciplinary action;

Or write about a close call with the judicial system, and how judicial action was avoided;

Or write about the climate of good or bad behavior that you observed, fostered or exemplified;

Or write about the interactions (the give & take) between the administration and the students. 

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Background:

The NC School of Science and Mathematics is, and was, a residential high school for exceptional students who applied to attend, from across the state of North Carolina.

In 1980, the first Student Handbook laid out the Code of Conduct (the rules) and the Student Judicial System (the consequences) for the new high school. In his message to the students, in the Handbook, Director Charles Eilber compared the Handbook to a foundation for a building; serving as a support for the structure, while not necessarily dictating the final appearance.

He said:

The content has been planned, discussed, and revised over many months by an experienced staff and faculty, and it represents our effort to assure students and parents of an orderly environment in which living and learning can begin to happen.

However, as we live together and learn from the experiences of this first year, the Handbook must reflect the lessons of experience.  It will evolve and change because many more of us - including students and parents - will be here to contribute to its use and development.

The Code of Conduct

Pages 26 through 30 (five pages) of the 1980-81 NCSSM Student Handbook covered the code of conduct. It served as a warning against mischievous criminal activity, covering every bad thing that an adolescent might dream of doing. It prohibited the use of alcohol, the use of drugs, truancy, vagrancy, possession of weapons, use of fireworks, vandalism, gambling, indecency, and disturbing the peace.

It covered all of the usual forms of misbehavior; but it didn’t begin to consider the forms of provocative behavior that we (“gifted and talented” students) could imagine. Pranking and PDA (Public Displays of Affection) ran rampant in the early days. Amateur experiments in chemistry and physics were common, testing the limits of the defined rules.

The Handbook also defined the parameters of our world. It covered where we were allowed to be, and when we were allowed to be there. There were sections on curfew, dorm visitation, and quiet hours. There were various required permissions, including permission to ride in cars… to leave campus… to visit home… or to stay overnight (elsewhere off campus). There was a short section addressing “off limits” areas, including areas under construction, and areas where minors were never permitted.

These restrictions were immediately and repeatedly tested. Some students attended a frat party at Duke University, early in the Fall of the school’s first year. We were often found, in the room of a student of the opposite sex, and not always during the hours of visitation. Classifying places as “off limits” (the tunnels, the morgue, the OR, and the pavilions of the campus -- a former hospital) was an exercise in futility. What teenager, in the golden age of the D&D gaming, wouldn’t dare to explore such an incredible maze of haunted spaces?

Student Judicial System

So the Code of Conduct was tested… frequently tested, from the moment we arrived. And that’s when the Judicial System took effect. According to the Handbook, “This system consists of three phases which indicate the disciplinary status of the student.” They were “Phase 1”, “Phase 2”, and “Phase 3”.

The jargon itself… the “Phase” system… was a source of amusement. The terminology was unfortunate, because many of us (science nerds) were fans of Star Trek, the original series, which was reaching a big audience through syndication before our school opened. Being “phased” by the administration seemed like a surreal experience -- as if we were part of a Star Trek plot where the phasers were set to “Warning” or “Stun” or “Kill”.

Most violations fell under the definition of a Phase 1 offense; which basically amounted to a written warning. It included things like a violation of curfew hours or visitation policy, or a failure to sign in or sign out.

Phase 2 generally resulted from repeated offences, and resulted in a call to the student’s parents and a written letter in the student’s file. It was considered a probationary status, which could put the students continued enrollment in peril. Still, it was not uncommon.

Phase 3, on the other hand, was no joking matter. A phase 3 violation was considered a serious offence. A phase 3 allegation could result in strict probation, suspension, or even dismissal from school. And it would result in a disciplinary hearing in front of faculty and staff; and in a school of only 150 students, living elbow to elbow, a disciplinary hearing would become common knowledge.

The Student Judicial System, as described by the Student Handbook ("The Phase System")

The 1980 and 1981 Student Handbooks included three pages describing the student judicial system.  Those policies have been transcribed below.  

There were minor changes in the 1981 description, primarily describing the composition of the hearing board and the timing of the hearing for a phase 3 violation.  Those changes are noted in brackets.

STUDENT JUDICIAL SYSTEM 

The Student Judicial System is used to determine the status of students who allegedly violate the school policies and guidelines. This system consists of three phases which indicate the disciplinary status of a student. Students may be placed on a phase status by a delegate of the Dean for Student Personnel Services (Head of Residential Life, Resident Advisors).

Phase I 

Report of an alleged violation is registered with the appropriate office, i.e.. Resident Advisor, Head of Residential Life, Assistant Director and Dean for Student Personnel Services, Director of the School. This representative re-views the case and determines the extent of the violation. If circumstances warrant, the representative will meet with the person(s) involved to determine whether Phase I should be initiated. Phase I is a warning in the form of an official written document from the individual initiating the Phase I status. The student has the right to appeal this decision to the Dean for Student Personnel Services or to the Director of the School. [...changed to - "to the Head of Residential Life" in 1981.] 

Examples of, but not limited to, Phase I status: 

- violation of curfew hours or quiet hours, failure to sign in or out, violation of visitation policy, abuse of kitchen privileges. 

Record of Phase I status: 

- a student who has been placed on Phase I status will receive a formal letter notifying him/her of this status decision. A copy of this letter will remain in the student's file and will be destroyed at the end of the academic term in which it was written (Fall/Spring) 

Phase II: 

Phase II is a condition of probation and can imply serious consequences regarding a student's status as a member of the school community. 

In cases of a more serious nature or if further violations occur after a student is placed on Phase I, the following options are utilized: 

1. The student may waive his/her right to a hearing and accept a Phase II status from the Student Personnel Services representative initiating the action. 

2. The case may be referred to the Head of Residential Life for a hearing. The hearing would include the student(s), the RA or individual reporting the violation, the Head of Residential Life, and a representative of the Student Personnel Services staff.

Examples of, but not limited to. Phase II status: 

- repeated violations, repeat of a Phase I incident or status as a result of a Phase III hearing.

Record of Phase II status: 

- a student who has been placed on a Phase II status will receive a letter from the Head of Residential Life. A copy of this letter will remain in the student's file and will be destroyed at the end of the school year. 

- any violation that merits a Phase II status decision will be reported to the student's parents. 

Phase III 

A Phase III disciplinary hearing is conducted in cases of serious instances of  violation of school rules, regulations or policies. 

In circumstances warranting strict probation, suspension or dismissal from school, the case will be determined by a School Hearing Board consisting of faculty and staff.

A Phase III hearing will occur once a case is referred to the Hearing Boar.  A student has a right to be represented as well as to present evidence and/or witnesses.  Hearings are informal and held in a closed setting.  A transcript of the hearing will serve as the official record of the hearing.

[Following section was substituted for the 3 preceding paragraphs, in 1981:

The Hearing Board will consist of: 

1.     Assistant Director and Dean of Student Personnel Services 

2.     Dean for Academic Affairs 

3.     Head of Residential Life 

4.     A full-time, faculty member 

4.  [sic]   Another full-time faculty or staff member chosen by the student in a given incident and may be the student's sponsor. This person will be an ad hoc member of the Hearing Board to provide appropriate insight with respect to the student involved, and perspective with respect to the hearing proceedings . (Non-voting) 

6.     A secretarial (non-voting) person will assist by recording the hearing proceedings.

Every effort will be made to institute the hearing within twenty-four hours following an alleged incident of student violation of regulations or policies. This time frame is subject to the availability of as much data as possible concerning the alleged incident .

The Hearing Board will render a decision based on a simple majority vote.]

Examples of but not limited to Phase III hearings, and/or status:

-alcohol and drug possession and/or use, vandalism, abuse of fire safety equipment, use of explosives.

Record of a Phase III status: 

-A student who has been placed on Phase III status as a result of a hearing will receive a formal written notice of the decision. A copy of this letter will be placed in the student's permanent school file for a period of time to be determined by the Hearing Board. 

-The School Hearing Board will determine the length of time that a student will remain on Phase III probation. [This part added in 1981: "...or suspension. Parents or guardians of the student involved will be informed of the judiciary action."]

Appeals Procedures: 

Phase I 

        A Phase I decision, if unacceptable to the student, can be appealed to the Head of Residential Life.

Phase II 

        A Phase II decision can be appealed to the Assistant Director and Dean of Student Personnel Services.

 

Phase III 

        A Phase III decision can be appealed to the Director of the School. Any Phase III decisions that involve suspension or dismissal from school can be appealed to the School's Board of Directors.  In an appeal of this kind, the official transcript of the hearing will serve in place of a new hearing. All students will be notified in writing of the appeal decision.

[Student Judicial System, Pages32-34, Student Handbook - 1980, NCSSM Historical Collection, NCSSM Digital Collection]

Consequences (Prompt #12 - Phasing)

by Ami Shah

On December 5, 1980, Kathy Edgerton, Kim Thrower and I, along with an 8 month pregnant Joanie Brown, went to dinner at Darryl’s. I think it was just before the birthdays of Kathy and me, but we were still underage. We decided to order a glass of wine each! (Technically Darryl’s should have been in trouble as they are the idiots who served alcohol to a 15 year old!)

Right after the first sip, who should come around the corner but [our resident advisor] Nancy Boden! She casually looked at us... knowing she caught us... and quickly said that we would all be facing consequences when we came back to school!! -- Phase 2, as it turns out. (I thought it was going to be a Phase 3, but Johnny Adams did something worse that weekend, hence just a phase 2!)

Here's the Phase 2 letter:

Kathy and Kim’s parents let them come home for the weekend, but mine were like, “You did what? You suffer the consequences”!

Hence my 16th birthday was spent in Durham on campus with no celebration! Below is the card for my 16th birthday, from school director, Chuck Eilber. Pretty sure Kim , Kathy and I were the first to receive a Phase 2, but Johnny got the first Phase 3 by setting a record at a progression party at Duke. (Thank you Johnny!)

My Juvenile Behavior (Prompt #12 - Phasing)

by Steve Gallup

In my junior year (my first year at NCSSM) I tallied a number of Phase I violations. I was late for curfew. I pranked other people on the hall. I failed to show up for my community service assignments. 

But for the most part, my transgressions were minor. I had no ambition for causing distress...  or creating havoc.

And during the summer (at home, between my junior and my senior year,) I was an assistant Sunday school teacher at church. I worked as a substitute newspaper delivery carrier for my mother and others. I helped my family and neighbors with yard and household chores. I played basketball with the children of refugees from Vietnam. 

I was a pretty good citizen. My mother even said so in writing.

She wrote a letter in my defense the following fall -- the first semester of my senior year. She described all of those positive actions, after she had been notified of the trouble I was in -- the trouble I’m about to describe.

She must have thought I was a pretty good kid, even though I would sometimes misbehave or shirk my responsibilities.

In a typewritten letter, addressed to the Dean of Student Personnel, she said, “…Naturally there were many... good and bad decisions Steve [has] made… and he has usually paid for or learned from each episode on the way to maturity."

And why did she write the letter, at all?

Let me tell you a little story....

The Vending Machine

Shortly after my senior year began (in 1981), I found myself exploring the bowels of Hill House late at night. Hill House held rooms for male students, including myself, on the first and second floors. I lived on the first floor.  But it wasn’t just a dormitory building. The basement of Hill House also held classrooms and a mail room. 

And somewhere in the basement of Hill House, there was a tunnel that led beneath the ground to the oldest buildings on campus - to the abandoned passages of the renovated hospital. But that tunnel had been completely hidden... somehow... in a feat of wizardry or engineering. (I can scarcely credit its disappearance to the administration, whose efforts were usually so insubstantial.)

Perhaps we were looking for that tunnel in vain, or perhaps we were just wandering the halls alone, but somehow, sometime after midnight, the four of us found ourselves in a vending area in the basement. 

We were in an off limits area, after curfew (a phase II offence at worst). It was me, my roommate, Robert Lee; my soccer teammate, John Armitage (all seniors); and an innocent junior, named Hooman Sabeti, who also lived on our hall. He had the unfortunate luck to be under our very bad influence that evening.

So... late at night, in a room in the basement, we happened to come upon a vending machine. Not a sparkling new machine, lit-up like a beacon of deliciousness.  On the contrary, this vending machine was in poor condition. It was unplugged and unlit, dusty and broken. 

Parts of the plastic barrier at the bottom of the machine were scratched and splintered. Some of the metal spirals, that would turn and propel the snacks forward, were disengaged and hanging loose. 

Some of the snack packages were still to be found in an orderly row, but most of the snacks  had been purchased long ago. It appeared to have been months since it had been restocked. Clearly the machine was out of commission and defunct.

It was the perfect opportunity for practical experimentation.

We wanted to see what kind of dexterity was required to dispossess this machine of its wares. 

Mind you, this was more like a form of quality control. We wanted to see if the vending machine could withstand a ne'er-do-well's efforts at theft... or if the machine's engineered protections could be circumvented by the right set of contortions, using our scrawny arms and nimble fingers.  We had not the slightest thought of selfishness, greed, or malice. It was purely scientific.

Robert went first.

He crouched down -- one knee on the ground. He had to get his shoulder low, close to the level of the teetering L-shaped plastic tray at the bottom -- the one that was normally pushed in to retrieve the purchased item.

He managed to get his arm through, with the tray partially opened, and with some contortions of arm and torso, he managed to turn his elbow and upper arm from a horizontal to a vertical position, within reach of a moldering pack of crackers. 

He was so close. We all watched in admiration.

As he strained to complete the maneuver... as we observed in rapt silence... we heard a man's voice behind us say, with no hint of amusement, “What’s going on here?"

In the Hands of the Authorities

A Phase III hearing was completely unexpected. I fully expected to skate by with a Phase I reprimand -- the customary penalty for a curfew violation. Instead we were accused of vandalism -- an egregious offence, and (in my opinion) a huge over-reaction.

I chalk it up to ill humor. Our Resident Advisor, T-- B----- reported the incident; lodging the complaint. The head of student services, Michael Collins scheduled the hearing, ensuring our punishment. 

Mr. B----- couldn’t see the slapstick comical humor of Robert’s practice attempt. He only saw loitering and a stymied attempt at theft. Mr. Collins didn’t see a merry band of prospective engineers deconstructing the machine-client interface. Rather, he perceived a misguided attempt to cause damage and destruction.

As a result of their lack of imagination… their lack of humor… their lack of judiciousness… the phase III hearing was set in motion.

But that wasn’t the worst part. As I sat in the office with Mr. Collins, being interviewed and admonished, he advised me that he would have to call my mother... and that I would have to tell her what had happened... and that I would have to do it in the room while he was listening!

That might be when I developed a hatred of authority.

He asked me for her phone number.

He called, and he said, “Mrs. Gallup, I’m here with your son. He has something that he has to tell you.”

And he handed me the phone.

The Judicial System in Action

The Hearing was held a few days later. John Armitage asked a faculty member to be our representative -- probably Dr. Miller, our English professor.

Dr. Miller had a sense of humor and a sense of perspective. He was respected, and he spoke with the resonant voice of of a practiced orator. 

He had the additional virtues of being thoughtful and objective. He was able to show that the vending machine had been long abandoned. The vending machine snacks had all passed their expiration dates long ago --  more than 6 months prior to our late night excursion.

I’m sure all of our stories were the same… because they were all true.

We had engaged in some foolishness. We had been caught red-handed. We had done nothing with malicious intent. We were just exploring and experimenting.

So, we were put on probation. We weren’t kicked out of school.

We were detained and humiliated instead.

My Phase III Letter

I tried rationalize my experience and the aftermath, spinning it into a spectacular transgression, and a victory for the little guys -- the oppressed.

We faced off with the administration, and we won… sort of.

Of all of the ephemera of my time at NCSSM, my Phase III letter is my most prized possession, on a par with my graduation diploma.

This is what it says, in full. (You be the judge.):

September 29, 1981

Steven Brian Gallup
2807 Wayland Drive
Raleigh, North Carolina 27608

Dear Steve:

This letter is to officially document action taken in response to the Phase III hearing conducted with you Tuesday, September 22, 1981. The hearing was conducted because of a report by a Hill House Resident Advisor that you participated with three other students in tampering with a vending machine, as well as having unauthorized access to student mailboxes. This incident was reported to have happen [sic] Sunday, September 20, 1981 at 2:00 AM.

As a result of the hearing, confirmation of your participation was made. The Hearing Committee was made aware that the incident was more spontaneous than premeditated. However, that does not detract from the fact that your actions were thoughtless and that you assumed you had the right to do what was reported. You must reflect on your behavior. It is not consistent with the goals of the School nor what is set forth in the Student Handbook.

The Hearing Committee decided to reduce the incident to a Phase II response. Accordingly, you are to make restitution of $10.00 for your fair share of the repairs to the vending machine. Please make check payable to NCSSM Residence Life Fund and submit it to Kathy Benzaquin, Head of Residential Life. In addition, you are placed on Phase II probation until the start of the second semester. Probation will be lifted, assuming no repetition of this or similar incidents, on January 27, 1982.

You have the right to appeal this decision in writing to the School’s director, Charles Eilber. The deadline for an appeal is October 8, 1981.

Finally, I wish to point out that the Hearing Committee reviewed your disciplinary situation within a context of what is fair and right for you. Much time was given by individuals here to work through your problem with you and give you every possible consideration. We expect a positive, helpful response from you and nothing less.

Please contact me if you have any concerns about this matter.

Sincerely,

Michael E. Collins, Dean

Student Personnel Services

cc: Mrs. Margaret Gallup

Taking a Big Risk

You would think that I had learned my lesson -- that I would do what was right, “and nothing less”.

But it wasn’t much later, that I made plans to sneak over to Wyche House, the girl’s dorm, at night. Three of us were going. I was going to provide my friends with support. One of us wanted to spend time with his girl friend, but didn’t want to go alone. I wished I had a girlfriend, and thought, "Maybe if I do this audacious thing, the girls will be impressed". I was young and foolish… very foolish.

So we snuck over to the girls dorm. They aided us in this breach of “The Code” by opening the door to the basement, to let us in. They had arranged to let their RA know that they were going to have a pajama party in the basement -- a cover for our intrusion.

Our plan was executed to perfection. In concept it was a success. But I have never spent a more miserable night, worrying about the repercussions, should I be caught whilst still on probation. I was never happier to sneak back to my proper place at sunrise, and slip back into my dorm room bed. The relief was palpable.

In my mind this breach of protocol… this trespass… this violation was much worse -- more lowly… more intentional… more fool-hardy, than the laughable matter for which I had been previously reprimanded. 

And yet, no hand of justice came down to punish me. This time, except for my troubled sleep, no repercussions came down.

Epilogue

I don’t know if I learned from my delinquencies.

Perhaps I learned to distrust authority.

Or that justice is blind.

Or that a mother’s love is unconditional.

I never did, from that point on, attempt to retrieve a packet of crackers or chips from a vending machine without a proper purchase. And so, I never did complete the misdeed I had been so ingloriously convicted of, in 1981.

Although I flirted with a major in Engineering, I quickly lost my excitement for the field, at Vanderbilt University, where the engineering program seemed focused on computerized advancements, and human ingenuity seemed to be of little concern. I changed to a pre-medical major instead.

I tried to stay out of trouble (though I didn’t always succeed), and I tried to surround myself with people with a good sense of humor (though they are sometimes hard to find) -- people with kindness, understanding, and affection.

I tried to learn from the experience "on my way to maturity".

~~~~~~~~~~

Appendix - Letter from Mrs. Margaret Gallup to Dean Collins regarding an unhappy incident involving her son at the NC School for Science and Math.

Excerpts from Joseph's Fragmented Biography

by Joseph Nathan Hall

-First published in "Joseph's Fragmented Biography" in June 2002 (at http://www.5sigma.com/joseph/bio/)

Fun with Water

I guess the best way to go about this will be in a fragmentary way, just kind of wandering from anecdote to anecdote. Here's one.

In my junior year I lived on the second floor of Wyche House. This was a weathered, slightly cockroach-infested two-story dorm (with a basement) at the corner of the campus. Wyche (rhymes with "Robert Reich") was inhabited for another year or two but then was condemned, and later renovated (I think). Anyway, my room was one of the larger ones, in the center of the building facing into the campus. My room faced Hill House, actually, the girls dorm, but it was so far away that I would have needed a pretty good telescope to do any serious peeking. Never got around to it myself but some other folks did.

Anyway, I digress. The room overlooked a sidewalk which wound around an air conditioning unit (I'm not sure what it cooled?) and toward the outside entrance of the basement. In my first days on campus I discovered that water thrown out the window onto the AC fan made a very gratifying sound and 360 degree spraying effect. You know what they say, when the shit hits the fan. I'd go dump a pint or so into the fan periodically just for jollies. The water would go in all directions with considerable force, maybe 30-40 feet horizontally.

So one day I found a bigger container. I don't remember what size it was but I'd guess a couple of quarts. I carted it over to the window and dumped it out the side directly into the fan. Wow. That considerable dose of water almost stopped the fan--I could hear/see it slow down. Biiiiggg splash. Cool.

Pretty quickly there was a knock on the door. There stood my downstairs "neighbor", Bart. He had the room directly below mine. Bart was wet. His face had a few drops clinging to it and his shirt had damp splotches. Bart had been doing his homework next to his open window just a few moments ago. He heard a sound, looked up, and a small wall of water came tsunami-like through his window. It doused him, his desk, his papers and other things lying nearby. After the initial shock, things clicked for him. He had noticed some minor weirdness with the fan earlier, sounds and the odd drop of water, but this was the first incident that clued him in.

That might have been the first time I met Bart, but fortunately he seemed more amused than wrathful. He turned out to be a great guy. We roomed together senior year and have kept loosely in touch off and on through the years.

The Shaving Cream Bomb

During junior year there was a period where you could find shaving cream on various odd parts of the dormitory, on doorhandles, underneath stair railings, and the like. Might as well find some alternative uses for it, since most of us didn't really need to shave all that often. I don't recall what the inspiration was but I eventually started experimenting with filling balloons with shaving cream.

I found out that if you just filled the balloon with shaving cream and burst it, not much happened. You just got a "cowflop" of shaving cream. On the other hand, if you partially filled a balloon with shaving cream, filled it the rest of the way with air, then shook it to distribute the shaving cream across the interior of the inflated balloon, then it made a really nice mess when it burst.

I further don't recall what the inspiration was for the next step, but three of us, myself, Chancellor and a fellow I'll identify as R.L., plotted to make a device, a shaving cream bomb if you will, that would be placed in some unsuspecting fellow's dorm room.

I came up with the idea of using a model rocket igniter to burst the balloon. Off we went to the mall to purchase a 9 volt battery and a packet of Estes model rocket igniters (the pyrotechnic kind that were easy to ignite, not the nichrome sparklers). We also purchased the most repulsive shaving cream we could find. I think it was lime scented.

Then we assembled a "cradle" of wire that held the battery, and taped the igniter and a loop of wire to the balloon. The cradle was to be placed on the floor, and the balloon was to be placed atop the cradle. When picked up, the wire on the balloon would touch wires in the cradle and complete the circuit, setting off the igniter, and hopefully, covering our victim with shaving cream and probably scaring him to death in the process.

The device was constructed. Chancellor had managed to figure out how to modify his room key so that it was actually a master key (and furthermore had removed the master tumbler from his room's lock so that the master key didn't work on it), and he was assigned the task of gaining entry into the victim's room and placing the balloon a couple yards from the door, with a towel wrapped around the base to conceal the, ahem, hardware.

When the device was in place, R.L. got the victim to go to his room. We heard the details later.

Unfortunately the balloon hadn't burst. :-( :-( Everything else went perfectly though. The victim opened his door, saw this balloon lying on the floor, scratched his head, and picked it up. The igniter lit but since it was completely taped to the side of the balloon (a last minute design change that I have always regretted) what happened was that air and shaving cream spurted out of a small hole in the tape. Well, at least it startled the daylights out of him.

I suppose he was also impressed that his dorm-mates would go to so much trouble to play a prank on him. I might have been worried ....

My Michael Collins Story: "Dyunnastannat?"

During my junior year I was reasonably well behaved. At least to the point where I didn't do much that they had a rule against. Later on in my senior year my life started to go a little sideways, and toward the middle of my final semester, a small but growing rebellious streak, intense disinterest in my classes and curriculum, and some extremely weird interpersonal things all converged to make me a somewhat less than ideal member of the student body. There were two separate incidents that led to my encounter with Michael Collins.

The first was when my R.A., "Menace," came to confiscate my speakers one evening. I don't remember whether we (Bart and I) were playing the stereo loudly at the time or not but we certainly had played it loudly in the past. Of course so had everyone else with a capable system. Anyway, we were very recalcitrant. Menace wound up banging on the door while we just ignored him. He was righteously pissed. Pretty level headed guy but that was the first time I ever heard him yelling. I guess we were pissed too.

The second was around that same time, when my friend Ward and I were wandering the halls late one night. We noticed a ceiling tile ajar and Ward wanted to see what was up there, just for the heck of it. Ward stood on a chair and looked into the ceiling. At that very moment one of the RAs turned the corner and inquired as to what we were doing. We said, "Just looking in the ceiling." Apparently we weren't believed. This was probably because Ward's hacker callings were somewhat strong at the time and the tile happened to be somewhat near a collection of modem lines and other stuff leading into the machine room that held our precious VAX-11/750. Not a bad piece of hardware for a high school to have in 1982.

Anyway, as things turned out I had not one but two appointments scheduled with Mr. Student Affairs, Michael Collins, on the same day. First in the morning with Steve Davis (head of the math department and "god" of the computer system), and then that same afternoon with Bart and Menace. I remember nothing of either except that when Collins was rendering his final thoughts/judgment/verdict/whatever he would punctuate the end of each sentence with "Dyunnastannat?" -- slurring his words together in the finest American tradition. Bart and I emerged a little shaken but we both had fun saying "Dyunnastannat?" "Dyunnastannat?" to each other for the next few days.

The result of these grim encounters was a letter sent to my parents. I had been "phased," in the disciplinary lingo of the time. I received a copy of the letter and noticed that it was full, or grammatical and speling er.ros

As one of the better English students on campus, what was I to do? Naturally I proofread the letter, marked it up, and taped it to the outside of my dorm room door.

A scenario repeated itself over the following 2-3 days. From inside my room I would hear someone stop by my door. He would mutter something like "hey, what's this?" Then there would be a minute or so of pause, a chuckle, then finally uncontrollable guffaws.

Eventually someone took it down.

Fun with Acid

Back to junior year. For a month or two one of my primary recreational activities was "windowsill chemistry." R.L., who introduced me to the notion, had a few little bottles of sulfuric and nitric acid, acetone, methanol, the like. He even had a little plastic squeeze bottle of hydrofluoric acid.

Oh, you're thinking, that kind of acid. What did you think? I've never been a serious illegal drug user, although it probably would have been more fun and possibly more enlightening than some of my more miserable adolescent/early adult experiences.

I digress. Again. That will be a pattern. Anyway, we would meet in my dorm room, select chemicals, and mix them in little beakers on my windowsill in the afternoon or early evening. I don't remember the combinations very well now. Not that it matters. We would try various things in various proportions. In general, if you mix nitric and sulfuric acid with something else, you get a cloud of either nitrogen tetroxide (the brown stuff) or nitrous oxide (clear stuff), or, generally, some of both. The reaction can be fairly vigorous, and of course, nitrogen tetroxide is fairly poisonous, hence the improvised fumehood.

It was fun to watch.

By the way, this is a good place to insert a disclaimer. If you try any of what I'm describing here, I won't be held responsible for any damage, injury, dismemberment, death, or whatever. Hell, I may not even remember what I did accurately. Caveat chemist.

We also got hold of a quart or two of technical grade hydrochloric acid that was used in some cleaning project (drains maybe?). Ahh, the wonder of seeing HCl poured into a beaker of aluminum foil strips for the first time.

I learned some other things. If you pour concentrated sulfuric acid on your skin, just hurry up, wipe it off and rinse. (It's syrupy.) No harm done so long as your skin's dry and you're fast. Nitric acid makes a yellow stain. "People nitrate." Hydrochloric is nasty. Exposing skin to the concentrated vapors can give you a terrible case of the itchies an hour or three later. Neither of us was stupid enough to accidentally or otherwise expose ourselves to hydrofluoric acid. We did bum a small piece of raw meat from the cafeteria to see what various chemicals would do to it. I remember being impressed that a drop or two of hydrofluoric acid seeped into a sample like it was a sponge and turned it a lifeless gray all the way through.

On to the specific anecdotes. Two come to mind. First, as you may or may not know, the recipe for nitroglycerine is a mixture of sulfuric acid, nitric acid and glycerine. You may also know that the process is very exothermic (liberates heat) and that unless great care is taken when mixing to keep things ice cold, the reaction will "run away" and just produce a brown cloud. (Of course you know that if you succeed in making the stuff you may just blow yourself up, but see the disclaimer above.) Well, we knew all this, but decided to mix up a little with warm ingredients anyway, to see what would happen. We retired to the parking lot behind Wyche one quiet afternoon, and into a tiny (10ml) beaker we poured a dab of each. Things started bubbling, then bubbled furiously, and suddenly there was a POOF and a van-sized cloud of nitrogen tetroxide was liberated. It drifted with the wind across the parking lot into the woods. Cool.

Good thing we didn't try that on the windowsill. It would be such a bummer to be the cause of a building evacuation.

The second that comes to mind is that one evening just after we had got the hydrochloric acid, we were experimenting with applying it to the stucco outside my window. I decided that it was better when somewhat diluted, down to maybe 5-8 percent. So anyway we were doing our thing, a little dab here, a little squirt there, and suddenly a head appeared out the window right below where I had just been dropping acid (so to speak) on the sidewalk.

It's Bart. Again.

He says, "Hey, something just dripped in my ear."

Oh shit! I say, "Rinse it out, man!"

"Huh?"

"Rinse it out! Then come on up here."

Bart survived the experience. He claimed his ear burned and itched the next day. Meanwhile he joined us as we created increasingly complex cocktails. We got punchy and were throwing very weird mixtures of stuff out the window onto the sidewalk late that night. One created a strange multicolored stain that lasted for years.

(that's all for now...)