Writing Prompt #12 - Phasing

Writing Prompt #12:  Write a story about the Student Judicial System, which included "three phases" of disciplinary action.

Due Date:  March 2, 2026

Details:  Write a story about how you, or someone else, received a Phase 1, 2, or 3 disciplinary action;

Or write about a close call with the judicial system, and how judicial action was avoided;

Or write about the climate of good or bad behavior that you observed, fostered or exemplified;

Or write about the interactions (the give & take) between the administration and the students. 

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Background:

The NC School of Science and Mathematics is, and was, a residential high school for exceptional students who applied to attend, from across the state of North Carolina.

In 1980, the first Student Handbook laid out the Code of Conduct (the rules) and the Student Judicial System (the consequences) for the new high school. In his message to the students, in the Handbook, Director Charles Eilber compared the Handbook to a foundation for a building; serving as a support for the structure, while not necessarily dictating the final appearance.

He said:

The content has been planned, discussed, and revised over many months by an experienced staff and faculty, and it represents our effort to assure students and parents of an orderly environment in which living and learning can begin to happen.

However, as we live together and learn from the experiences of this first year, the Handbook must reflect the lessons of experience.  It will evolve and change because many more of us - including students and parents - will be here to contribute to its use and development.

The Code of Conduct

Pages 26 through 30 (five pages) of the 1980-81 NCSSM Student Handbook covered the code of conduct. It served as a warning against mischievous criminal activity, covering every bad thing that an adolescent might dream of doing. It prohibited the use of alcohol, the use of drugs, truancy, vagrancy, possession of weapons, use of fireworks, vandalism, gambling, indecency, and disturbing the peace.

It covered all of the usual forms of misbehavior; but it didn’t begin to consider the forms of provocative behavior that we (“gifted and talented” students) could imagine. Pranking and PDA (Public Displays of Affection) ran rampant in the early days. Amateur experiments in chemistry and physics were common, testing the limits of the defined rules.

The Handbook also defined the parameters of our world. It covered where we were allowed to be, and when we were allowed to be there. There were sections on curfew, dorm visitation, and quiet hours. There were various required permissions, including permission to ride in cars… to leave campus… to visit home… or to stay overnight (elsewhere off campus). There was a short section addressing “off limits” areas, including areas under construction, and areas where minors were never permitted.

These restrictions were immediately and repeatedly tested. Some students attended a frat party at Duke University, early in the Fall of the school’s first year. We were often found, in the room of a student of the opposite sex, and not always during the hours of visitation. Classifying places as “off limits” (the tunnels, the morgue, the OR, and the pavilions of the campus -- a former hospital) was an exercise in futility. What teenager, in the golden age of the D&D gaming, wouldn’t dare to explore such an incredible maze of haunted spaces?

Student Judicial System

So the Code of Conduct was tested… frequently tested, from the moment we arrived. And that’s when the Judicial System took effect. According to the Handbook, “This system consists of three phases which indicate the disciplinary status of the student.” They were “Phase 1”, “Phase 2”, and “Phase 3”.

The jargon itself… the “Phase” system… was a source of amusement. The terminology was unfortunate, because many of us (science nerds) were fans of Star Trek, the original series, which was reaching a big audience through syndication before our school opened. Being “phased” by the administration seemed like a surreal experience -- as if we were part of a Star Trek plot where the phasers were set to “Warning” or “Stun” or “Kill”.

Most violations fell under the definition of a Phase 1 offense; which basically amounted to a written warning. It included things like a violation of curfew hours or visitation policy, or a failure to sign in or sign out.

Phase 2 generally resulted from repeated offences, and resulted in a call to the student’s parents and a written letter in the student’s file. It was considered a probationary status, which could put the students continued enrollment in peril. Still, it was not uncommon.

Phase 3, on the other hand, was no joking matter. A phase 3 violation was considered a serious offence. A phase 3 allegation could result in strict probation, suspension, or even dismissal from school. And it would result in a disciplinary hearing in front of faculty and staff; and in a school of only 150 students, living elbow to elbow, a disciplinary hearing would become common knowledge.

The Student Judicial System, as described by the Student Handbook ("The Phase System")

The 1980 and 1981 Student Handbooks included three pages describing the student judicial system.  Those policies have been transcribed below.  

There were minor changes in the 1981 description, primarily describing the composition of the hearing board and the timing of the hearing for a phase 3 violation.  Those changes are noted in brackets.

STUDENT JUDICIAL SYSTEM 

The Student Judicial System is used to determine the status of students who allegedly violate the school policies and guidelines. This system consists of three phases which indicate the disciplinary status of a student. Students may be placed on a phase status by a delegate of the Dean for Student Personnel Services (Head of Residential Life, Resident Advisors).

Phase I 

Report of an alleged violation is registered with the appropriate office, i.e.. Resident Advisor, Head of Residential Life, Assistant Director and Dean for Student Personnel Services, Director of the School. This representative re-views the case and determines the extent of the violation. If circumstances warrant, the representative will meet with the person(s) involved to determine whether Phase I should be initiated. Phase I is a warning in the form of an official written document from the individual initiating the Phase I status. The student has the right to appeal this decision to the Dean for Student Personnel Services or to the Director of the School. [...changed to - "to the Head of Residential Life" in 1981.] 

Examples of, but not limited to, Phase I status: 

- violation of curfew hours or quiet hours, failure to sign in or out, violation of visitation policy, abuse of kitchen privileges. 

Record of Phase I status: 

- a student who has been placed on Phase I status will receive a formal letter notifying him/her of this status decision. A copy of this letter will remain in the student's file and will be destroyed at the end of the academic term in which it was written (Fall/Spring) 

Phase II: 

Phase II is a condition of probation and can imply serious consequences regarding a student's status as a member of the school community. 

In cases of a more serious nature or if further violations occur after a student is placed on Phase I, the following options are utilized: 

1. The student may waive his/her right to a hearing and accept a Phase II status from the Student Personnel Services representative initiating the action. 

2. The case may be referred to the Head of Residential Life for a hearing. The hearing would include the student(s), the RA or individual reporting the violation, the Head of Residential Life, and a representative of the Student Personnel Services staff.

Examples of, but not limited to. Phase II status: 

- repeated violations, repeat of a Phase I incident or status as a result of a Phase III hearing.

Record of Phase II status: 

- a student who has been placed on a Phase II status will receive a letter from the Head of Residential Life. A copy of this letter will remain in the student's file and will be destroyed at the end of the school year. 

- any violation that merits a Phase II status decision will be reported to the student's parents. 

Phase III 

A Phase III disciplinary hearing is conducted in cases of serious instances of  violation of school rules, regulations or policies. 

In circumstances warranting strict probation, suspension or dismissal from school, the case will be determined by a School Hearing Board consisting of faculty and staff.

A Phase III hearing will occur once a case is referred to the Hearing Boar.  A student has a right to be represented as well as to present evidence and/or witnesses.  Hearings are informal and held in a closed setting.  A transcript of the hearing will serve as the official record of the hearing.

[Following section was substituted for the 3 preceding paragraphs, in 1981:

The Hearing Board will consist of: 

1.     Assistant Director and Dean of Student Personnel Services 

2.     Dean for Academic Affairs 

3.     Head of Residential Life 

4.     A full-time, faculty member 

4.  [sic]   Another full-time faculty or staff member chosen by the student in a given incident and may be the student's sponsor. This person will be an ad hoc member of the Hearing Board to provide appropriate insight with respect to the student involved, and perspective with respect to the hearing proceedings . (Non-voting) 

6.     A secretarial (non-voting) person will assist by recording the hearing proceedings.

Every effort will be made to institute the hearing within twenty-four hours following an alleged incident of student violation of regulations or policies. This time frame is subject to the availability of as much data as possible concerning the alleged incident .

The Hearing Board will render a decision based on a simple majority vote.]

Examples of but not limited to Phase III hearings, and/or status:

-alcohol and drug possession and/or use, vandalism, abuse of fire safety equipment, use of explosives.

Record of a Phase III status: 

-A student who has been placed on Phase III status as a result of a hearing will receive a formal written notice of the decision. A copy of this letter will be placed in the student's permanent school file for a period of time to be determined by the Hearing Board. 

-The School Hearing Board will determine the length of time that a student will remain on Phase III probation. [This part added in 1981: "...or suspension. Parents or guardians of the student involved will be informed of the judiciary action."]

Appeals Procedures: 

Phase I 

        A Phase I decision, if unacceptable to the student, can be appealed to the Head of Residential Life.

Phase II 

        A Phase II decision can be appealed to the Assistant Director and Dean of Student Personnel Services.

 

Phase III 

        A Phase III decision can be appealed to the Director of the School. Any Phase III decisions that involve suspension or dismissal from school can be appealed to the School's Board of Directors.  In an appeal of this kind, the official transcript of the hearing will serve in place of a new hearing. All students will be notified in writing of the appeal decision.

[Student Judicial System, Pages32-34, Student Handbook - 1980, NCSSM Historical Collection, NCSSM Digital Collection]

Consequences (Prompt #12 - Phasing)

by Ami Shah

On December 5, 1980, Kathy Edgerton, Kim Thrower and I, along with an 8 month pregnant Joanie Brown, went to dinner at Darryl’s. I think it was just before the birthdays of Kathy and me, but we were still underage. We decided to order a glass of wine each! (Technically Darryl’s should have been in trouble as they are the idiots who served alcohol to a 15 year old!)

Right after the first sip, who should come around the corner but [our resident advisor] Nancy Boden! She casually looked at us... knowing she caught us... and quickly said that we would all be facing consequences when we came back to school!! -- Phase 2, as it turns out. (I thought it was going to be a Phase 3, but Johnny Adams did something worse that weekend, hence just a phase 2!)

Here's the Phase 2 letter:

Kathy and Kim’s parents let them come home for the weekend, but mine were like, “You did what? You suffer the consequences”!

Hence my 16th birthday was spent in Durham on campus with no celebration! Below is the card for my 16th birthday, from school director, Chuck Eilber. Pretty sure Kim , Kathy and I were the first to receive a Phase 2, but Johnny got the first Phase 3 by setting a record at a progression party at Duke. (Thank you Johnny!)

My Juvenile Behavior (Prompt #12 - Phasing)

by Steve Gallup

In my junior year (my first year at NCSSM) I tallied a number of Phase I violations. I was late for curfew. I pranked other people on the hall. I failed to show up for my community service assignments. 

But for the most part, my transgressions were minor. I had no ambition for causing distress...  or creating havoc.

And during the summer (at home, between my junior and my senior year,) I was an assistant Sunday school teacher at church. I worked as a substitute newspaper delivery carrier for my mother and others. I helped my family and neighbors with yard and household chores. I played basketball with the children of refugees from Vietnam. 

I was a pretty good citizen. My mother even said so in writing.

She wrote a letter in my defense the following fall -- the first semester of my senior year. She described all of those positive actions, after she had been notified of the trouble I was in -- the trouble I’m about to describe.

She must have thought I was a pretty good kid, even though I would sometimes misbehave or shirk my responsibilities.

In a typewritten letter, addressed to the Dean of Student Personnel, she said, “…Naturally there were many... good and bad decisions Steve [has] made… and he has usually paid for or learned from each episode on the way to maturity."

And why did she write the letter, at all?

Let me tell you a little story....

The Vending Machine

Shortly after my senior year began (in 1981), I found myself exploring the bowels of Hill House late at night. Hill House held rooms for male students, including myself, on the first and second floors. I lived on the first floor.  But it wasn’t just a dormitory building. The basement of Hill House also held classrooms and a mail room. 

And somewhere in the basement of Hill House, there was a tunnel that led beneath the ground to the oldest buildings on campus - to the abandoned passages of the renovated hospital. But that tunnel had been completely hidden... somehow... in a feat of wizardry or engineering. (I can scarcely credit its disappearance to the administration, whose efforts were usually so insubstantial.)

Perhaps we were looking for that tunnel in vain, or perhaps we were just wandering the halls alone, but somehow, sometime after midnight, the four of us found ourselves in a vending area in the basement. 

We were in an off limits area, after curfew (a phase II offence at worst). It was me, my roommate, Robert Lee; my soccer teammate, John Armitage (all seniors); and an innocent junior, named Hooman Sabeti, who also lived on our hall. He had the unfortunate luck to be under our very bad influence that evening.

So... late at night, in a room in the basement, we happened to come upon a vending machine. Not a sparkling new machine, lit-up like a beacon of deliciousness.  On the contrary, this vending machine was in poor condition. It was unplugged and unlit, dusty and broken. 

Parts of the plastic barrier at the bottom of the machine were scratched and splintered. Some of the metal spirals, that would turn and propel the snacks forward, were disengaged and hanging loose. 

Some of the snack packages were still to be found in an orderly row, but most of the snacks  had been purchased long ago. It appeared to have been months since it had been restocked. Clearly the machine was out of commission and defunct.

It was the perfect opportunity for practical experimentation.

We wanted to see what kind of dexterity was required to dispossess this machine of its wares. 

Mind you, this was more like a form of quality control. We wanted to see if the vending machine could withstand a ne'er-do-well's efforts at theft... or if the machine's engineered protections could be circumvented by the right set of contortions, using our scrawny arms and nimble fingers.  We had not the slightest thought of selfishness, greed, or malice. It was purely scientific.

Robert went first.

He crouched down -- one knee on the ground. He had to get his shoulder low, close to the level of the teetering L-shaped plastic tray at the bottom -- the one that was normally pushed in to retrieve the purchased item.

He managed to get his arm through, with the tray partially opened, and with some contortions of arm and torso, he managed to turn his elbow and upper arm from a horizontal to a vertical position, within reach of a moldering pack of crackers. 

He was so close. We all watched in admiration.

As he strained to complete the maneuver... as we observed in rapt silence... we heard a man's voice behind us say, with no hint of amusement, “What’s going on here?"

In the Hands of the Authorities

A Phase III hearing was completely unexpected. I fully expected to skate by with a Phase I reprimand -- the customary penalty for a curfew violation. Instead we were accused of vandalism -- an egregious offence, and (in my opinion) a huge over-reaction.

I chalk it up to ill humor. Our Resident Advisor, T-- B----- reported the incident; lodging the complaint. The head of student services, Michael Collins scheduled the hearing, ensuring our punishment. 

Mr. B----- couldn’t see the slapstick comical humor of Robert’s practice attempt. He only saw loitering and a stymied attempt at theft. Mr. Collins didn’t see a merry band of prospective engineers deconstructing the machine-client interface. Rather, he perceived a misguided attempt to cause damage and destruction.

As a result of their lack of imagination… their lack of humor… their lack of judiciousness… the phase III hearing was set in motion.

But that wasn’t the worst part. As I sat in the office with Mr. Collins, being interviewed and admonished, he advised me that he would have to call my mother... and that I would have to tell her what had happened... and that I would have to do it in the room while he was listening!

That might be when I developed a hatred of authority.

He asked me for her phone number.

He called, and he said, “Mrs. Gallup, I’m here with your son. He has something that he has to tell you.”

And he handed me the phone.

The Judicial System in Action

The Hearing was held a few days later. John Armitage asked a faculty member to be our representative -- probably Dr. Miller, our English professor.

Dr. Miller had a sense of humor and a sense of perspective. He was respected, and he spoke with the resonant voice of of a practiced orator. 

He had the additional virtues of being thoughtful and objective. He was able to show that the vending machine had been long abandoned. The vending machine snacks had all passed their expiration dates long ago --  more than 6 months prior to our late night excursion.

I’m sure all of our stories were the same… because they were all true.

We had engaged in some foolishness. We had been caught red-handed. We had done nothing with malicious intent. We were just exploring and experimenting.

So, we were put on probation. We weren’t kicked out of school.

We were detained and humiliated instead.

My Phase III Letter

I tried rationalize my experience and the aftermath, spinning it into a spectacular transgression, and a victory for the little guys -- the oppressed.

We faced off with the administration, and we won… sort of.

Of all of the ephemera of my time at NCSSM, my Phase III letter is my most prized possession, on a par with my graduation diploma.

This is what it says, in full. (You be the judge.):

September 29, 1981

Steven Brian Gallup
2807 Wayland Drive
Raleigh, North Carolina 27608

Dear Steve:

This letter is to officially document action taken in response to the Phase III hearing conducted with you Tuesday, September 22, 1981. The hearing was conducted because of a report by a Hill House Resident Advisor that you participated with three other students in tampering with a vending machine, as well as having unauthorized access to student mailboxes. This incident was reported to have happen [sic] Sunday, September 20, 1981 at 2:00 AM.

As a result of the hearing, confirmation of your participation was made. The Hearing Committee was made aware that the incident was more spontaneous than premeditated. However, that does not detract from the fact that your actions were thoughtless and that you assumed you had the right to do what was reported. You must reflect on your behavior. It is not consistent with the goals of the School nor what is set forth in the Student Handbook.

The Hearing Committee decided to reduce the incident to a Phase II response. Accordingly, you are to make restitution of $10.00 for your fair share of the repairs to the vending machine. Please make check payable to NCSSM Residence Life Fund and submit it to Kathy Benzaquin, Head of Residential Life. In addition, you are placed on Phase II probation until the start of the second semester. Probation will be lifted, assuming no repetition of this or similar incidents, on January 27, 1982.

You have the right to appeal this decision in writing to the School’s director, Charles Eilber. The deadline for an appeal is October 8, 1981.

Finally, I wish to point out that the Hearing Committee reviewed your disciplinary situation within a context of what is fair and right for you. Much time was given by individuals here to work through your problem with you and give you every possible consideration. We expect a positive, helpful response from you and nothing less.

Please contact me if you have any concerns about this matter.

Sincerely,

Michael E. Collins, Dean

Student Personnel Services

cc: Mrs. Margaret Gallup

Taking a Big Risk

You would think that I had learned my lesson -- that I would do what was right, “and nothing less”.

But it wasn’t much later, that I made plans to sneak over to Wyche House, the girl’s dorm, at night. Three of us were going. I was going to provide my friends with support. One of us wanted to spend time with his girl friend, but didn’t want to go alone. I wished I had a girlfriend, and thought, "Maybe if I do this audacious thing, the girls will be impressed". I was young and foolish… very foolish.

So we snuck over to the girls dorm. They aided us in this breach of “The Code” by opening the door to the basement, to let us in. They had arranged to let their RA know that they were going to have a pajama party in the basement -- a cover for our intrusion.

Our plan was executed to perfection. In concept it was a success. But I have never spent a more miserable night, worrying about the repercussions, should I be caught whilst still on probation. I was never happier to sneak back to my proper place at sunrise, and slip back into my dorm room bed. The relief was palpable.

In my mind this breach of protocol… this trespass… this violation was much worse -- more lowly… more intentional… more fool-hardy, than the laughable matter for which I had been previously reprimanded. 

And yet, no hand of justice came down to punish me. This time, except for my troubled sleep, no repercussions came down.

Epilogue

I don’t know if I learned from my delinquencies.

Perhaps I learned to distrust authority.

Or that justice is blind.

Or that a mother’s love is unconditional.

I never did, from that point on, attempt to retrieve a packet of crackers or chips from a vending machine without a proper purchase. And so, I never did complete the misdeed I had been so ingloriously convicted of, in 1981.

Although I flirted with a major in Engineering, I quickly lost my excitement for the field, at Vanderbilt University, where the engineering program seemed focused on computerized advancements, and human ingenuity seemed to be of little concern. I changed to a pre-medical major instead.

I tried to stay out of trouble (though I didn’t always succeed), and I tried to surround myself with people with a good sense of humor (though they are sometimes hard to find) -- people with kindness, understanding, and affection.

I tried to learn from the experience "on my way to maturity".

~~~~~~~~~~

Appendix - Letter from Mrs. Margaret Gallup to Dean Collins regarding an unhappy incident involving her son at the NC School for Science and Math.

That Old Familiar Pain (Prompt #10 - Music and Song)

by Steve Gallup

If you ever wanted to conjure up the essence of high school in just one song, it would be practically impossible.

Some moments in high school are moments of loneliness and quiet desperation -- moments of teenage angst.  Some are moments of defiance and freedom -- moments of teenage rebellion.  And some are moments of love and hope -- moments of youthful optimism.

In the '80s, Under Pressure by Queen, and Out Here on my Own, from the movie Fame, sort of exemplified our feelings of stress and loneliness at the School of Science and Math.

Songs that encapsulated our dreams and defiance included Hit Me With Your Best Shot by Pat Benatar, and Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey.

Songs of relief and revelry included Best of Times by Styx, Let the Good Times Roll by The Cars, and Celebration by Kool & the Gang.

Each of those singles bring  back certain pieces of the high school experience. But there are two songs that go a little deeper -- that bring back a memory of the whole achievement, looking back on it as if it has just concluded -- Dream Weaver by Gary Wright, and Same Old Lang Syne by Dan Fogelberg.

Dream Weaver is etched in my psyche. It sets off my limbic system. Whenever I hear the burbling, synthesized arpeggios at the beginning of the song... I’m transported back in time... to a dimly lit, crowded room in school, surrounded by classmates watching a slideshow -- photographic slides fading in and out. 

You see, our art teacher, Joe Liles, took lots of photos. He created slideshows and set them to music. After preparing the show, he would arrange to have the entire class gather in a room (or auditorium) to sit for a moment and watch the show together. It was a chance to reflect and bond after a year of tribulation.

The slideshow became a tradition and the tradition survived. At nearly every reunion, Joe's slideshow is played again.  Each time we have grown a little bit older.

For the class of '82, that slideshow always begins with the swirling synthesizer intro of Dream Weaver, taking us straight back to our junior year. It's followed by the evocative lyrics, "I've just closed my eyes again...". And pretty soon, listening to the haunting melody, I've "climbed aboard the dream weaver train", right along with Gary Wright.

Whenever I hear the song... anywhere in the world... I think of my class gathered together, watching familiar faces from out of the past... set to the playlist of the era... starting with Dream Weaver. 

Same Old Lang Syne has a similar affect. It was released during our stay at NCSSM, but the meaning and the emotion of the song has grown even stronger over time. It's nostalgic. In fact, nostalgia is written into the lyrics,  mournfully sung by Dan Fogelberg:

We drank a toast to innocence
We drank a toast to time
Reliving in our eloquence
Another auld lang syne…

When he sings, "Just for a moment, I was back at school, And felt that old familiar pain",
it’s truly gut-wrenching — the realization and acceptance that we can’t go back and revisit the past, no matter how much we might like to.

So now, each New Years Eve, I indulge myself, in a few minutes of musical nostalgia.  I play Same Old Lang Syne, or I post it on my Facebook page.

For a moment, I think of my close friends and my mentors. I think of their passing or their distance.

I think of the angst and the heartbreak, the dreams and desires, the success and celebration.

I think of the love... and the love lost... when we went our separate ways.

Dr. Jon Miller's letter on the Significance of Poetry

Letter composed by Dr. Jon Miller

-accompanying the gift of "Modern American and British Poetry" by Louis Untermeyer

J--------,

This is much too small a token to repay all the... [personal details omitted by the editor]

The book is for me a special one; it has even been a dangerous one.  Perhaps because of your present course, it will be equally special, equally dangerous for you also.  It is an old book, not old enough to be antiquarian, but old enough to be well used.  I have a number of editions of it in my collection; I acquire them whenever I see them, and I don't see them very often anymore.  I have given one or two to other students whom I though might care.  I even gave on once as a wedding present.  The couple still speaks to me.  you are getting a copy of what for me is the most special edition of all.  The smooth, faded blue cloth and the beveled edges are just as they are on my mother's copy of this same edition.  I wonder if the $3.50, once penciled into the corner of the front free-fly, that I erased, was the original price.  Does it seem a bit high for the depression?  Anyway, no other book, regardless of price, has contributed so much to my own lo e of poetry.

I will tell you the story that I have told to most of the others upon whom I have inflicted other copies.  The telling, too, is this time all the more special because of the connections of our families... [personal details omitted.]

When I was growing up, my family spent several weeks each summer in the home of my grandparents in the small, very small, town of Alden, Iowa.  Small towns are wonderful for small children.  We could go anywhere, do anything.  The few shops along Main Street were much more accessible to us than any of Durham's larger, grander stores.  Your Grandmother will remember that Durham was in those days "the city of exciting stores."  The river running through Alden was all that a river could be, complete with falls; Alden was, the sign said, " the best town by a dam site."  There were open spaces, and there were lots of other children at loose ends ready to catch fireflies or to play auntie (anti or ante)-over or hide and seek.  Iowa itself is glorious in summer -- the jet-black earth producing a deep, lush green everywhere and all set  beneath an endless blue sky.  It was a sensuous place.  However, by the time that I was finishing high school, things had changed a bit.  The black, green, and blue were as dazzling as before; but the shops now seemed very small and much emptier; and one-time playmates had summer jobs and were little interested in "geekier," "nerdier" city folk.  I retreated into my grandparent's house - a large, old house built in 1870 by a retired farmer come to town.  It frequently smelled of ginger and clove from my grandmother's cookie baking or of coffee which endlessly brewed.  My uncle, a pianist, practiced eight or so hours everyday, providing every activity a soundtrack.  Family came together joyously and chaotically at mealtimes and in the evenings, but there were long spaces of time to be filled.  I found myself often in my uncle's room upstairs.  It was large and dark and quiet except for the Chopin or Rachmaninov wafting up and in.  There, in the bookcase, I found the 1936 copy of Untermeyer used by my mother in a college course she had taken at Drake.  It was the perfect place, the perfect time, to encounter the green freedom" of Stevens' "Sunday Morning," the most sensuous of all poems.  Later, I was dumbfounded to read a very different, longer version in my own modern poetry class at Davidson.  In Untermeyer, too, I first tried to read Marianne Moore, whom I later met, and many other singers perhaps smaller to whom time has not been so kind, poets such as Wylie, and Teasdale and Lindsay and Robinson and Brooke and Sassoon.  Reading these poems, aimlessly at first and then by choice, not because they were assigned or  because there was to be a test taken or because someone had suggested them, allowed them to do their magic slowly, to become richly musical; and maybe in some small way, it made them mine.  Of course, I still have mother's copy; and just in the last several years, I have included a couple of Peter Viereck poems into a WWII unit for American Studies -- poems I first happened upon decades ago in my own copy of the 1950 edition.

Clearly, this is a book that I love for both its contents and associations; it, certainly, is a book that I have spent many loose and glorious hours with.  I hope that you also find some pleasure in it as well as a few special friends to visit and revisit for as long as I have visited my own friends there.

Thanks once more for all you have done for me this year and for being yourself a good friend. 

Profile - Kathy Benzaquin and the Residential Life Program

 first published in 1983 in the campus and NCSSM community newsletter -- Dialogues.

Kathy Benzaquin is proud of the Residential Life Program at NCSSM and with reason. The system she and her staff have evolved has become a model for those establishing public residential schools in other states. It was only three years ago that Kathy was asked to create a program that would enhance a rigorous academic curriculum by making young high school students feel at home as well as by providing a broad spectrum of co-curricular activities. In response she developed a strong, flexible, accountable program manned by a dedicated staff of Residential Advisors (RAs). 

Kathy attributes success to her policy of selecting staff members whose abilities and interests are tailored to program needs. RAs, whose primary responsibility is to care for and support students, also organize and oversee traditional high school activities — social, recreational, and service. Matching the task to a staff member's talent and interest has made the 24- hour a day, 7-days a week, entry level job attractive to excellent candidates, rewarding for students, and has strengthened every facet of the Residential Life Program.

Support of her staff, particularly professionally, is a priority for Kathy. Her success in training may be measured by job offers RAs receive from other residential schools and by their loyalty to NCSSM. Kathy is philosophical when an offer does lure someone away and they leave with regret — it means she is accomplishing one of her purposes. 

For most students entering NCSSM, Resident Advisors are an unknown quantity, but not for long. The companionship and leadership of a caring adult means a great deal to these young people away from home, and their appreciation is evident. A close association between students and staff is beneficial in many ways, including reducing resentment if discipline is necessary. 

Other Residential Life policies also are designed to make discipline a more positive learning experience. One is to include students in the decision-making process; a second is to establish rules based on a specific consequence for a specific cause. Predictable judgments seem easier to take. 

Another policy that is working well is one requiring students to make a study or social contract with RAs if their grades fall. The staff is especially pleased because some students in good academic standing have voluntarily made contracts. 

For the future Kathy has three wishes — to find more financial support for her staff, to find enough time in the NCSSM schedule so that her staff can make better use of their skills in leading leisure time activities, and to maintain the level of excitement that characterizes the Residential Life Program today.

[Dialogues Volume 3, Number 2, March 1983; Dialogues; NCSSM Digital Collection]

25th Reunion Speeches - Class of '82

Speech by Dr. Jon Miller - Reflections on the Class of 1982

by Jon Miller

October 2007

When Irene asked, and Dot Doyle told, me to say again what I said more than 25 years ago at your senior dinner, I thought the idea was a bit strange' but when Dot emailed me the text of that long ago talk, I realized that much of what I had said then I had said to the wrong people.  I had given an old folks talk to young people.  Well, perhaps, now that you are just a tad older, I have the opportunity to get it right this time, perhaps some of what I had to say then will be more appropriate now -- now that you've more memories and ha e spent more time and richer time with those memories... like even today.

Reunions are always a strange business.  Attending them, I am always afflicted by double vision.  How many times today have you surely seen a 17 year old as you were talking to some one a bit older?  How many times in the palpable presence of so many good friends has our mind wandered off to think about others who weren't here.  How many times in the nowness of today have you almost, not quite, been then.  Reunions are tricky and so are memories.  This thenness and nowness of memory was part of what I tried to talk about then when I said...

Jamie came to see me some weeks ago and said talk to us and I said about what and she said just share some memories and I said fine.  Well Jamie, I can't -- it's too hard a job.  Oh, the memories are there, almost two years worth -- two full years of long days and lots of people.  But everything my mind brings up my heart strikes dumb in my mouth.  My words don't work.  They're not so rich, so varied, or so full as my memories.  I suspect one would have to have lived the last two years here to understand us and this place -- and if you've lived it, the words really aren't necessary.  They aren't sufficient.

So no memories -- no farewells.  For those of us who stay on -- you the first class, will always be here and we shall constantly glimpse you just rounding a corner or drawing away from a window and we shall hear your voices echo in each answer to every question that we ask from now on.

And for those of you who are leaving -- each to go in you own separate way -- you will take with you bits and pieces of the rest of us, small ghosts of this place.

I quit by saying for all of my eminent colleagues - to each one of you -- thanks for sharing yourself with us

                            and

finally

            Ya'll come back right soon

                                                        you hear.

Well you have come back -- if not soon at least now.  And many of those who are not here this time have visited at other times. Some of you have become regular campus fixtures here, helping us to shape policies and programs.  Others of you are not physically here so often but continue to be part of the NCSSM community in a myriad of specal ways.  Whatever role you have chosen to play or been able to play, you were here once and that, in itself, has made you now and forever part of this family.  Your one time presence tugs at those mystic chords of our individual and corporate memories, making you forever present, forever part of each of us, forever part of all of us.

As we get older, individually and institutionally, we come to realize how important memory is.  What we have done, what we have thought and felt, who we have known sometimes comes very close to being who we are; and our memories often enable us to find ourselves and to know ourselves.  Institutionally, our 25th birthday cele ration led NCSSM two years ago to remember and to explore ways of preserving some of what its individual family members remembered.  Those of us on that first faculty were asked to put together a small slice of "what it was like then." We want to share that with you now.

NCSSM Class of 1982 - 25th Reunion Toast

by Lois Thornburg

October, 2007

I was asked to speak tonight as someone who mingled with many of my classmates, as opposed to just hanging with one small group.

I am honored to be thought of as such but not sure I deserve to be -- as there are so many of you I feel as though I don't know well enough.

I am so happy to see you all tonight.  You really are a wonderful bunch of people, and I thank you for being here.  It is a good thing we do in being here, for we share something wonderful and are each other's time keepers -- each other's memory preservers.

I don't know about the rest of you, but my days of "steel-trap mind" are long gone, and I can find no machine for it like I can for muscle and bone loss.

Still, there are some moments I find unforgettable, such as:

Polly singing "Fire and Rain" a cappella in the Assembly Hall at a talent show -- on pitch; 

Keith Promislow, at another assembly, standing up to confront the creation scientists with the evidence of hydrogen's escape velocity;

Eric Roush boldly using expletives in his campaign speech for class office;

Thomas Gilchrist on piano and vocals, bringing down the house with his rendition of "On Broadway;"

Susan Anderson in the hall of Hill House stopping me to say that John Lennon had died;

Janeen Vanhooke and Herman Goins tearing up any dance floor;

Lisa Sykes singing "Stop! In The Name of Love" while doing all of Diana Ross' moves;

Lisa Sykes hopping across campus with ribbons on her crutches to match her preppy wardrobe;

Robert Lee, deadpan, on stage holding a daisy and reciting lewd German verse;

sweet, adorable Michelle Zimmer having a roomful of shiny, kick-ass Shotokan trophies;

a wet Dr. Miller trying to explain himself before the board of trustees;

nearly all of us posing grandly for photos in Duke Gardens on Senior Skip Day.

You remember things I don't.  I love being reminded.  And I thank those of you who have kindly elevated my phone call to the radio station on that snowy morning to folklore status.  I never knew that act would give me my bit of immortality, but I'll gratefully take it.  --Way better than to have been expelled.  Somehow I graduated never even having been phased.  I want to thank those who protected me.

We are each other's keepers.  As we come together, we bring along those who otherwise cannot be here:  Ellis Smith, Freshteh Golkho, Alex Daughety, Stephanie Locklear, Lisa Sykes Leland.  We keep them with us.

If it seems that to indulge in our memories every few years is to live in the past -- and I've been accused of it -- I suggest that "past, present, and future" as used to partition a human life means next to nothing in time.  One's past is indeed just a piece of one's very brief moment that might as well be seized as often as possible along the way.  By coming together, we continue to seize the day.  Our day.

And now I propose a toast to you, to us... To our time together.